March 2, 2012
-
She Left Her Heart In the Freezer
She left her heart in the freezer.
She didn’t mean to. It just kind of happened, one day. She tried to warm it up. For a while. The microwave couldn’t heat it up. The oven did nothing. She took the frozen thing in her hands. It was so, so cold.
He bumped into her and took it from her hands. He dropped it on the stone, where it shattered. She only watched it fall, in slow motion. From his hands. Passively wondering what she should do now.
She left it there, in a million pieces. Each piece held a part of her and she was lost. She wandered, for a long time. Through dark hallways and shadowed paths she stumbled along, clutzy without her heart. It was gone, and she had to learn how to survive. She didn’t feel anything when she fell down. She only started to crawl to the finish line. Barely moving, inch by numb inch.
The hallways started growing less and less dark, and the paths less and less full of shadows. She found herself beside her heart again, broken and frozen. She stared down at it while the dawn came near.
Someone came alongside her. He stared for a while at her heart. He bent down and started repairing it, piece by cold piece. The fragments started warming in his hands. Sometimes he destroyed her heart again, only to see if she would repair it on her own this time. She tried but fumbled with shaking hands. He put his hands over hers and continued rebuilding it.
Soon, she saw that it was whole and warm and open. She wondered how it had happened. She peered at her heart, resting carefully in his hands. It was beating and alive. She wondered for how long.
She feared leaving her heart in the freezer again.
—-
I’ve been thinking about putting all of my shorts into a little anthology and selling it online as an ebook. Do you think it would do well?
By the way, this one is a repost
Comments (17)
This anthology ought to work nicely. You might arrange the stories thematically, like @plantinthewindow has done with his poetry book.
Yes, i think it would. it’s certainly worth doing.
I really liked it, so yes, I think it would do well. The beauty part is you would be able to get plenty of recs from Xangans.
That was great writing.
I really like how the fragments began warming his hands, indicating that just the act of someone trying to repair it had a healing affect. I fucking LOVE your writing. I definitely think people would be receptive to your it!
I liked it
This is so beautiful. I feel like it’s inspiring me to write a story of my own.
I think an ebook would be a great idea. Not sure if it’d become a top seller by tomorrow, but I don’t see any harm in trying
If everything else is as good as this one, then you should go ahead.
But Anthologies aren’t usually that popular so it might not get much publicity but I don’t see the harm in trying.
This was good.
In an anthology? For sure.
If the rest of your writing is as creative as this and you promote it well, who knows….I think you have a good shot at it.
excellent!
This reminds me of my mother.
@RighteousBruin - Thanks. I’m not sure how I’m going to arrange it, but that has been one of my ideas
@roscoes_farm - Thank you!
@Kellsbella - Thanks!!
@ladywolf_aq - Thank you
@amateurprose - Haha that’s the idea, my dear
And I’m glad you’re so enthusiastic about my writing, it means a lot that people are.
@godfatherofgreenbay - Thanks
@aMeagerMind - Wow, I feel humbled that it inspired someone else to write, thank you for that.
@Nushirox2 - lol I actually feel like this is one of my weaker stories!
@Cestovatelka - Thank you
@mynameisblueskye - Thanks
@vexations - Thank you. Like I said above, I feel like this is one of my weaker pieces, but a writer is always their worst critic.
@Guitarcb17 - Thank you
@MaidenOfTheFae - Hmm I’m not sure if that’s a good or bad thing.
Yes. Sell your shorts online by all means. Certify that they’re the shorts of a 15-year-old homecoming queen.
Definately a good idea! I would buy it just for this little story.
I like it. A lot. I took a Fiction Writing course at UMass Lowell last semister to try and cure my writer’s block & it was the best class I ever took. We sat in a group & read our own work out loud to the group. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done, but it was well worth it. Everyone started out by saying, “This isn’t any good … It’s not finished… I can’t read very well…” because writing is personal. Even fiction. We put a part of our souls in everything we write & to expose that soul by reading out loud is a scary, scary thing to do, but once you start, it’s addicting (too bad spelling isn’t!) What an adreleline rush! I’ve never felt so alive! I really recommend finding a writer’s group to join. It’s a wonderful thing to see firsthand how your words affect people, to hear their praise & comments! It’s electrifying!
What I learned: always have a good first sentence. It draws the reader in, makes them want to know more. Same with first paragraph, first page. Your first sentence is awsome. I HAD to read the rest! My only complaint? It’s not long enough! I wanted more. I’ll leave you with something I learned from a fellow student. She had this tatoo’d on her arm & it’s so true: “Writing is something you do alone in a room.” Just remember to get out of that room once you’re done!!! Keep writing, you have the gift! Ü
Shadow320