November 18, 2008

• Coming Out

  To this day, I still don’t know what drove me to do it. But I can say, it was both one of the worst and one of the best decisions I have ever made. Or, right decision, wrong time? Whatever. The point is, I did it. I kissed her. I kissed her, then said in a sultry voice “I’ll be right back.” Well, the fact of the matter is, I really had to pee. Because, you know, beer does that to you… you gotta pee. So when I came back to the table, she says, “You know you just kissed me, right?” I said, yes, I did know that. And I smiled. Well, what happened that night.. is not what you think. I didn’t go home with her that night. I did make out with her though. And she told me I was a very good kisser. I said Really? I’ve never been kissed before. And she almost didn’t believe me. But it was the truth.

  Well, there was another woman there that night. She was married, but she had an obsessive crush on the woman I was making out with. She called her after we all left the bar, because she thought I went home with her. It wasn’t until a couple weeks later that I slept with her. It was a drunken experience, but I didn’t completely forget it. We had gone out bar hopping, and I was too drunk to drive home, so I had to stay at her house. She’d made pizza, and I was eating a piece and watching tv, when all of a sudden, she pulled me off the couch and started kissing me. And more… then we went down to her room. The rest is history. We had sex one more time after that, and we weren’t drunk that time.

  Well, it was the best decision because I discovered my love for women. It was the wrong decision because she was a casual sex kind of person. I discovered I’m not.

  This is my coming out story. I was watching The L Word last night, and it was an episode that they were all sharing their coming out stories, so I’ve finally written it down.

  I still haven’t told everyone that I’m bisexual. Well, I might even be a lesbian… due to my inability to have sex with men. I have to be drunk to let a man touch me. My mom knows, but my dad doesn’t. My mom thinks it’s experimentation. It’s not. I care more what my dad thinks. One of my sisters knows (I have three). Most of my friends know, and most of the people I work with know. Only one of my extended family knows, one of my aunts. She’s bisexual too.

  • 2:37 pm
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