February 22, 2012

• I just can’t breathe

  I can barely see through my watery vision. On Monday night during my psych class, Nick wrote me a letter. He wanted me to read it, but I didn’t want to. Because I knew that before he left that night, I was going to break up with him. After I said what I needed to say to him, waiting for his bus, he asked me if I wanted to read it. I said no again. I’m glad I didn’t say yes. I would have broken down in the car, as I did just now. He sent it to me in a Facebook message, and all day yesterday I didn’t read it.

  I just read it, and now I feel so alone. It was the sweetest letter anyone has ever written to me. I feel a deep sense of despair. I know I have my xanga friends and other friends, but it’s just not the same. I miss him so much. I miss the way we used to talk for hours. I just don’t understand why it was so different for us in person. I miss the way it used to be, and I can’t stop crying.

  And I’m sorry that I haven’t commented on any of your posts, I just can’t right now.

  • 12:28 pm
  • 7 Comments