Month: May 2004

  • up ahead, there's a fork in the road


    i walk the beaten path


    and the fork is just ahead now


    i can count the number of steps on my hand


    it goes into four directions


    through the dreariness of this forest


    i cannot tell which ones


    wind slowly back to the beginning


    fear envelops me


    confusion warps my brain


    which path shall i choose?


    from here where i stand,


    they all look the same


    tears slowly fall


    i timidly step out,


    not knowing which way to go


    i cannot see any lights


    at the end of any of them


    i stand, lost


    i cannot stand here forever


    my mind plays tricks on me


    my eyes do not show me


    what is really there


    i must guess


    i am afraid of failure


    of the wrong choice


    "oh dear god please help me"


    i cry

  • She walks to school with the lunch she packed
    Nobody knows what she's holdin' back
    Wearin' the same dress she wore yesterday
    She hides the bruises with linen and lace

    The teacher wonders but she doesn't ask
    It's hard to see the pain behind the mask
    Bearing the burden of a secret storm
    Sometimes she wishes she was never born

    Through the wind and the rain
    She stands hard as a stone
    In a world that she can't rise above
    But her dreams give her wings
    And she flies to a place where she's loved
    Concrete angel

    Somebody cries in the middle of the night
    The neighbors hear, but they turn out the lights
    A fragile soul caught in the hands of fate
    When morning comes it'll be too late

    Through the wind and the rain
    She stands hard as a stone
    In a world that she can't rise above
    But her dreams give her wings
    And she flies to a place where she's loved
    Concrete angel

    A statue stands in a shaded place
    An angel girl with an upturned face
    A name is written on a polished rock
    A broken heart that the world forgot

    Through the wind and the rain
    She stands hard as a stone
    In a world that she can't rise above
    But her dreams give her wings
    And she flies to a place where she's loved
    Concrete angel


     


    This story is kinda me, ya know? But this story is the story of so many people...


     


    Lynyrd Skynyrd- Freebird


    If I leave here tomorrow
    Would you still remember me?
    For I must be travelling on, now,
    'Cause there's too many places I've got to see.
    But, if I stayed here with you, girl,
    Things just couldn't be the same.
    'Cause I'm as free as a bird now,
    And this bird you can not change.
    Lord knows, I can't change.


    Bye, bye, its been a sweet love.
    Though this feeling I can't change.
    But please don't take it badly,
    'Cause Lord knows I'm to blame.
    But, if I stayed here with you girl,
    Things just couldn't be the same.
    Cause I'm as free as a bird now,
    And this bird you'll never change.
    And this bird you can not change.
    Lord knows, I can't change.
    Lord help me, I can't change.


     


    Everytime I hear this song, I think of Forest Gump...this song is in the part where Jenny is wearing those awesome silver shoes and that silver shirt and she's standing out on the deck and she climbs up and her way too thin arms are above her head, holding onto the deck above her, and she's ready to jump, but she doesn't... and when she starts to get back down, she slips and almost falls. She sits down on that chair there, the wind blowing through her hair, and she hugs herself, rocks, and cries.

  • I've been sleeping and dreaming. I had a nightmare that I was in the Texas Chainsaw Massacre...ya, not a very good dream. And then I had a dream about getting married...it was very odd...there was a mashing machine in the church and there were tons of bubbles that were leaking out...then my step dad woke me up cuz I had to put away grocerys...so I have food to eat now...it's all frozen stuff though...but whatever...food is food, right?

  • Ya...I'm sick, staying home today....chest cold thing or whatever....my ear really frickin hurts and I woke up like 5 times in the middle of the night cuz my throat hurt and I had to spray it with that chloroseptic stuff or whatever...which is disgusting but it works...and my nose is all stuffy...damnit...I really hate being sick...I just took 3 extra strength Tylenol, 1500 mg when I'm only supposed to take 1000, but I don't care...whatever I have to do to get my ear to stop hurting...I need some codiene...or however you spell it...or SOMETHING damnit!!!!!!!

  • Hi!!


    Well, I've been looking at Elfwood today, for the first time in a long time. Breathtaking artwork!! Especially in those tours...holy shit! Just amazing artwork...no words!!

  • Fallin- Alicia Keys


    I keep on fallin’
    In and out of love 
    With you
    Sometimes I love ya
    Sometimes u make me blue
    Sometimes I feel good
    At times I feel used
    Lovin you darlin’
    Makes me so confused
     
    I keep on 
    Fallin’
    In and out of love with you
    I never loved someone
    The way that I'm lovin' you
      
    Oh, oh , I never felt this way
    How do you give me so much pleasure
    And cause me so much pain
    Just when I think
    I've taken more than would a fool
    I start fallin’ back in love with you
     
    I keep on 
    Fallin’
    In and out of love with you
    I never loved someone
    The way that I'm lovin' you
      
    Oh baby
    I, I, I, I’m fallin’
    I, I, I, I’m fallin’
    Fall
     
    I keep on 
    Fallin’
    In and out of love with you
    I never loved someone
    The way that I'm lovin' you
     
    I'm fallin’
    In and out of love with you
    I never loved someone
    The way that I'm lovin' you
     
    I'm fallin’
    In and out of love with you
    I never loved someone
    The way that I'm lovin' you


     

  • Awww....pretty kitty!!! Nice kitty... hahaha, anyways, I gotta leave at about 9:30 or a little before to get to my grandma's at 10, which is the time me and my dad set up. And I KNEW it!!! He'd hung up with me the first time we talked to talk to his girlfriend! Damn am I smart! LoL.


    I think I'm getting sick....a cold. damnit. My nose was runny yesterday (oh joy) and now my throat hurts. I better not have strep damnit. How can I have strep with no tonsils? Well, I did in the beginning of the year, so it's possible. I don't wanna be sick!!!!!!!! I hate being sick....but who the hell doesn't? Oh shit...I might get mono...I haven't had it yet. After you have it once in your life you can never get it again... I'm definately feelin a little bitta upper resperatory illness....drr....

  • My dad just woke me up....he called me and was like "You were supposed to call me tonight you silly goof." And I was like "What time is it?" I went to sleep pretty much when I got home and just now woke up, and I ATE!!!!!!!!! I ate today!!! I had some Snicker salad, some sort of pasta, a little sandwich thinger, and two yummy ummy cookies. And that's all I had....wait, that's not true, I'm sorry. My step dad brought Arby's home for lunch. And my dad is supposed to be calling me back, but he's not... I guess he had another call or something, so he hung up with me...He might be talking to his GIRLFRIEND!!! Hahahahaha....I've been telling him for the longest time that he needed to find a girlfriend...I'm so happy for him! Cuz now he's a happier person...so yeah. I'm driving down to my grandma's tomorrow and meeting him there to get my money for graduation stuff....omg I think I might cry!! Graduation is coming up SO fast! At the beginning of the year I couldn't wait for it and time was passing so slow and now it's towards the end and I don't want it to end and time is passing so amzazingly fast!! :tear: Anyways, better go cuz I have nothing else to write...

  • OMG am I freaking tired...the baby shower was fun!!! Good times good times. Yeah...not much else to say right now...

  • Good day yesterday!!! yay!!! took a nap in my quilt during seventh hour, yeah, that was fun!! And we watched the seniors SMOKE the teachers in trench!! Yeehaw!!!!!!!!!!!! fun fun fun day yesterday...yay