I may or may not be the only person that feels this way, but to me, it's just plain WEIRD and uncomfortable when your family starts talking about sex and Fifty Shades of Grey. I do not want to know that my family members are reading those books...
I was at dinner with my sister Rachel, my mother, my aunt and her boyfriend, and my grandparents last night. So they start talking about Fifty Shades... *facepalm* My grandma tells me that my novel isn't any good unless there's lots of good, steamy sex.
Then my aunt asks me if I've ever been in a sex toy store
And my mom says that ever since she's read the books, my step father will randomly give her a good smack on the ass
Then she tells my aunt's boyfriend that if he reads the books, he will go to the adult toy store and buy a flogger. My mother, my aunt, and my sister have read the books. My grandmother wants to read them.
Since we were sitting in a restaurant, I couldn't exactly spout off about how horrible the books are and that they grossly misrepresent the lifestyle. My grandma said that I need to do lots and lots of research to write my novel. I said, "I don't really need to do any research. I already know what a violet wand is." Everyone looks at me and goes, what is that? "It's an electric wand, about this long (using my hands to gesture), that you use to poke your submissive to electrocute them," I say. "Why would you do that?" My aunt asks. "It provides stimulation." My aunt says, "Oh my," and covers her mouth with her hand.
I just never, ever want to go through this again. It was horrible...and my sister didn't contribute to the conversation at all...so she was just as mortified as I was. Thankfully, the conversation soon passed onto other topics, but still....